Do you know why you do what you do? Maybe you look at some else and wonder “Why Can’t I be like them?” I used to think that people who acted opposite of me were some how off. Have you ever thought that way? I was frustrated with people so consequently I had very few friends. I labeled it as, “Well, I’m not a people person”. Its like the girl who doesn’t know how to dance so she curses the music. People who don’t know how to get along with people tend to curse the person. In reality its our own lack of understanding that gets us the results in life. One of the most LIFE changing books for me was Personality Plus by Florence Littauer. This amazing little book goes into detail about four basic personalities. The Choleric, Melancholy, Phlegmatic and Sanguine. Most people have two personality traits, one of those being dominate. For example, someone may be considered a Choleric Sanguine or maybe a Melancholy Phlegmatic. So what personality are you?
A Choleric is someone who is “always” right but often wrong (although they will never admit it). They are usually in management or running companies. They thrive off giving orders and being in charge. They can be forceful and argumentative because, after all, they are right. They get things done although there may be a wake of destruction in their path.
Melancholy is someone who pays attention to details. They are the ones who straighten out picture frames at other people’s houses. They thrive off order. Their clothes and appearance is usually very neat. They can tend to judge others and they also struggle with times of depression. They are sometimes the doctors and engineers.
The Phlegmatic is a quiet soul. They are calm and collected. They thrive off being appreciated for their actions although their actions often go unnoticed. They hate conflict and will avoid it at all costs. They resent being yelled at because after all they would never treat someone like that. They are witty but it takes time for them to “warm up” and in that time they may be thought of as boring. They are very loyal.
The Sanguine is the life of the party. They tend to dress in loud colors and want to be apart of everything. They love to tell their story and they thrive off a captive audience. For them all of life is fun! They tend to over commit and often forget where they parked. They are bubbly and fun loving. Everyone is their “best” friend.
Im sure you have identified with one or more of these. Most people tend towards two of these.. For example, a Choleric Melancholy may be very competitive and detailed making them a formidable opponent however if they start losing they will quickly reason how its not their fault. All these personalities, working together, make society go round. The key is not to label others but to understand yourself in how you relate to others. Learn to Dance and enjoy the music!
I highly recommended picking up a copy of Personality Plus.
“Know Thyself” ~ Socrates